Instead of internalizing my rage like a healthy person, I will be pouring concentrated (~ 5 mol/L) loathing out in relatively entertaining bi-monthly (lol “bi”) installments. Welcome to “Hypo Rants About Things.”
So I was sitting in the Victim/Witness Center in the courthouse downtown (surely a much more interesting story than my topic, but fuck you, whose thread is it?) waiting for the prosecutor to finally show up. I figured I’d be in for at least an hour of ass-sitting, so I brought The Brothers Karamazov (“Rebellion” is the most edifying chapter of modern western literature, by the way). Half-an-hour passes and my asian counterpart shows up. At that point I put The Brothers down and had a look around. I sat in a room of no less than two dozen people. The only other person holding some form of print was a soon-to-be-dead old man of probably 70 years, reading one of the nearly-as-old magazines sitting on one of the end tables. I turned to my aforementioned asian counterpart and I said, “Nobody reads anymore?” He looked up from his phone, replied nonchalantly, and resumed typing away. I only then noticed the incessant click-clicking of a thousand text messages flying from phone to phone. I lost any pretense of concentration. Everyone, save a small group of blue hairs, sat fixated on their phones, type-type-typing away. Some giggling to themselves.
(Rant starts now)
What the fuck people? Especially we young people. Is it that hard to call and talk to someone? Or does what you have to say not even warrant the minimal contact a phone call elicits? Is this why one can’t carry on a conversation tête-à-tête with a kid these days? Conversation has been reduced to a butchered, base abbreviation with absolutely no hint of humanity? I read some of these alien texts and I wonder at what point I stumbled into A Clockwork Orange. It appears that about half of those active on this forum actively despise the 1337-speak, and I really don’t see any distinction between “1337” and “IDK, my BFF Jill.” Fight the urge to lower yourself to the average text messager.
I can’t believe I just read all that
ditto, However there is a valid point there. I usually do not speak through abbreviation but ion occasion, I may.
Maybe you could make a different rant about the retarded way some people type…
Well, I’m not allowed to text, so I have very little to say about this.
i find texting a pointless feature, are we really to lazy to talk now? 
What about when it’s something you don’t want others to hear? Or if you just want to give them a quick message, why not text?
If you dont want anyone to hear it, dont speak loudly or move away from others. there are some small advantages that have a 1 in a million chance of happening, though
I’m one of those few people who don’t have a cell phone. But I still find texting kinda pointless, unless I’m in class or something (lol). I’d call someone at any other time.
i cant find my cell and hardly use it, i actually dont like phone talking to much…
I will text if I know the other person is in a position where they can’t answer calls or if I have something short and simple to say.
I don’t either Kdiuldlea but whatever
A text message has its merits, but it is not a surrogate for conversation. It is to conversation as a WOW guild is to friendship.
Haha, nice comparison.
indeed it was
a good point, but in a public place like that it would be more fair to the people around to text, i mean, how much more would you have liked to hear two dozen people yelling at their cell phones? but you are right that so many people just text and never talk on the phone
c’mon Hypo, start ranting
Well, it’s an odd Friday: rant day.
As anyone reading this a second time will know, I rarely sleep. It has its pro and cons. Anyways, not sleeping leads inevitably to seeing the most god-awful infomercials every now and then: Billy Mays or that fucking Sham-Wow guy screaming at you to buy some shit that either doesn’t work or is completely unnecessary or the various real estate scams and pyramid schemes that only a certifiable retard would buy into. It’s actually quite depressing. Granted, only insomniacs and serial killers are up, but that’s not the issue. At some point, someone got it into their head that a fucking blanket with two holes in it, or whatever the fuck this is was a great idea. A sellable, PROFITABLE idea. And the only thing worse than that thought is the apparent fact that these things are at least marginally profitable enough to allow for their continued existence. It really does call into question our society as a whole (or maybe it’s just America, because we really are mostly retarded over here, I think). Hey, maybe you have some “cash unclaimed”, they’ll just need a credit card number! All of this shit is a by-product of stupid, lazy people in conjunction with free market capitalism (I’m a professor of economics. I mentioned that right?), you don’t see any Soviet Russia-made Mighty Putty. (Presumably, the putty would see you, though.) Then again, you don’t see any Soviet Russia-made anything anymore (fuck you commies!) so maybe this pile of shit is another of the innumerable necessary evils we’re forced to endure. And since there will never be an shortage of stupid masses, there will never be an end to useless shit parting fools from their money.
that body blade thing looks like theyre trying to jack o… wank their jolly rancher.