This reminds me of a dramatic moment in literally any survival horror/action game ever.
Decided to try my hand again, this time using Musescore instead. I think it turned out well enough, maybe not quite as laid-back.
https://musescore.com/user/6640781/scores/29783939
I feel like you could do away with the choir and give their lines to the trumpets instead, and it would have the same (if not more) impact. Also, the trumpet solo at bar 97-98 could go up an octave to keep the energy high. If you wanna go full brass ensemble, maybe replace the flute with a piccolo trumpet.
Kudos for the attempt, it can be hard to translate a rock piece into brass ensemble if you don’t know the strengths of each instrument. I did like how the trumpets sounded at bar 63-68 of the chorus, that’s where they are at their best here.